...Cleaning up: take everything on the floor and place them on the table/sofa/chair

...dusting: two swipes with the swiffer, then wants a new pad because it's "dirty now"

...making her sandwich: take the cheese to eat it while saying, "ok, i will snack on the cheese while you make the sandwich, ok?"

...being quiet: speaking at a loud whisper

...eating everything i give her: only if they're chocolates

She goes through her day eating hotpockets, crackers, pizza sandwiches, gold fish, and some times toast when she's really desperate. but now, we implemented the beginning of the end of making her own selection and as a result, an fussy and dramatically sad child appeared. this is a moment in her childhood that i'm sure she'll remember as torture, now, but hopefully we can all laugh about it when the years go by.

the torture of childhood, and frustration of parenthood, at the moment:

Before kids

1. effort put into work usually = predictable results
2. cleaning house = clean house (for weeks if not a month+)
3. do laundry = laundry gets folded and put away immediately
4. cooking food = eaten food
5. plans to go out = going out promptly and nicely dressed
6. going to a restaurant = food ordered, food eaten at a leisure pace, bill paid at the end of meal
7. traveling = book flight, hotel, car, and plan activities
8. morning coffee = coffee brewed, pour into cup, leisurely sipping hot/warm coffee while talking with spouse, or reading the news/comic :o)
9. dirty floor = general dust and hair (what can i say, i shed like tree during the fall)
10. dirty wall = slightly dusty up in the high area
11. bed time = whenever and still feel rested
12. sleepless nights = waking up to pee
13. socializing = meeting up with friends and have conversations and dirty jokes or just jokes over good food and some times wine
14. decorating the house = nice comfy furniture, finely replicated arts, or "econimcal" pieces at crate and barrel
15. buying a car = whatever car you want and can afford to buy, budget's the only limiting factor
16. Poop = uh, not a topic of conversation, not even in the dirty jokes.
    

With kids

1. effort put into kids usually = variable results, mostly the kinds you don’t expect
2. cleaning house = dirty in 5 or if extraordinarily lucky, 10 minutes before it gets dirty again
3. do laundry = put in washer, and maybe dryer in the same day. definitely no folding and put away until a week or maybe longer
4. cooking food = maybe food will get touched by hands, likely won't get eaten
5. plans to go out = coordinate a babysitter (quite a difficult task), hope kiddos don’t get sick on the day of, hope to have clothes with no food stains or residual barf stains available (or make sure to do laundry and get them out of the dryer promptly, and hang up immediately - righttttt...)
6. going to a restaurant = behavioral control and expectations set with kiddos, food ordered, food may or may not get eaten (forget leisure pace), always prepared to have food to go at a moment’s notice, bill paid at the beginning of meal in case if we have to make a quick exit
7. traveling = book flight, kid centric hotel, get a van, and plan kiddy activities
8. morning coffee = coffee brewed, pour into cup, slurp it right away or risk having it sit on the counter until the day’s over
9. dirty floor = food crumbs in the dinning area and a trail out to other areas in the form of foot prints, spilled/splattered liquid which sometimes just dry with a visible spot, other times, sticky, and other times, fuzzy if not noticed by mommee early enough
10. dirty wall = food stains from hands, mouth, mobile toys collision, hand held toys collision, body part collision that may sometimes leave a stain, other times, dents, hand/foot prints
11. bed time = 2 hours after kiddos go to bed
12. sleepless nights = waking up and staying up for an hour to two, some times three cause kiddo(s) got recharged after 4 hours of sleep
13. socializing = meeting up with friends who have kids the same age, talk about kids and sharing our joyous moments, trials and tribulations, all over gold fish, some other crackers, or just pizza. No booze.
14. decorating the house = stain resistant economical furniture from target/walmart that can take a beating and if breaks, no heartaches from parents and easy on the wallet to replace, walls covered with kiddy photos only parents think cute, or memorable (kids will hate them when they’re older and realize what they’re looking at)
15. buying a car = Van or SUV, all with extremely high safety ratings and LARGE cargo space, oh and of course, MUST have DVD player.
16. Kiddo Poop = Happy, relieved, relaxed parents

Franki and vince have gatroenteritis, and so vomitting and diarrhea is our way of life for the past 3 days. Vince was 3 days behind franki with his symptoms, so when he heaved yesterday...

Franki announced loudly: Mommee, Daddee, vincent barfed. why is he barfing?
Daddee: 'cause he's sick like you
Franki: we're kids. we barf a lot. when we're older, we won't barf any more.
Daddee: i don't know about that. you guys barfed because you're sick, not because you're kids.
Franki sighed: what's up with all the barfing daddee?

M: no franki, you cannot have it. you need to stop asking.
F: i have an idea. how about you and daddee shrwink down to be babies and i'll be the big girwol. then i can send you to your room and then i can get it all by myself?
A silly question gets a simple answer
Dave: Little girl, why are you naked?
Franki: because i took my clothes off. :o)

LOL doih :o) dave felt pretty smart after he received that answer :o) LOL

She has great work ethics
Dave called home from work and Franki answered the phone.
D: hi monkey. wachadoin'?
F: i'm working on my stuff
D: oh yeah? wacha workin' on?
F: Mommee's putting vincent to bed. bye daddee.
Dave called back: Hi monkey. can i talk to mommee?
F: daddee. you have to stop calling me. go back to work. :o)

Daddee: you're the bestest daughter!
Franki in "isn't it obvious" tone: i know daddee


Franki: hey mom, could i bring this into the bath tub?
Mommee: lemme see...hmmm...i guess so...but it's not a bath toy, on second thought, maybe you shouldn't.
Franki: how about on another thought, you let me bring it into the bath tub?


Franki: vince, no don't do that. you're breaking the rules
Vince grunted at her
Franki: no vince. if you do that again, i'm going to send you to your room
Vince grunted at her harder
Franki grunted back in frustration then stormed away into her room, then from her room she says "fine. i'll go into my room and be by myself since you won't listen to me"


Mommee: Franki...where's your drawing stuff? the pencil box looks empty.
Franki: my drawing stuff is downstairs
Mommee: why are they downstairs? they should be in your pencil box. I know YOU know that...
Franki: i put them in my shapes box
Mommee: ok...so where's the shapes box
Franki in an exasperated tone: i said they're downstairs

My thoughts...she's not even four and she's this this this...this...can't even find a word... :o) what's worse, she's been doing this since she was 3'ish...scary...

Nov 23, 2009: I just witnessed Franki singing lullabies to her brother in Pantera style, with the head banging and all, yet, she has never seen a rock video... :o) LOL